Yes, I am now on Facebook.
Why? I want to socialize with others in this lifestyle. FetLife is NOT for me. Experience Project - wow. If I get one more unsolicited penis picture sent to me, I might commit acts of violence. I love my Thursday and Sunday chat rooms that I found (*waves to all my new friends*) but I cannot always join. It really depends on what is happening with the family life, homework, and other mommy and work duties. I love-love-love this online blog community (*waves to all my new blogging friends*) and it makes my day when someone comments here, so I thought maybe I would expand a little bit and try FB, too.
If you are brave under your real name or if you have a pseudo-identity on FB, please FRIEND me by clicking: Perfectly Punished (TheWife) Facebook Page
Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts
Showing posts with label communication. Show all posts
Thursday, October 2, 2014
Sunday, September 28, 2014
Paddling in the Tears
Today was a tiny breakthrough. For the first time ever, I cried during a spanking.
The day started off great, but at one point, we disagreed about something involving one of our children, and the ensuing debate (he called it an argument) got a little heated. He left the room in a huff after raising his voice at me.
Once he calmed down, we descended to the basement to the Spank Room. The paddle came out. The lecture consisted of him retelling how it came that he yelled, his apology for raising his voice, his view that I was not listening but rather over-talking him, and that since this was not going to be a part of our relationship, a spanking must happen.
The pants went down.
The underwear went down.
My belly went down so that I was leaning over a storage bench.
Once in position, the warm up started. The warm up HURT. Once the real spanking started, it was a little unbearable. I started sobbing. Begging. Turning. Crying some more. Begging some more. Turning some more. When it was all said and done, I got a few extras for not staying still.
When I got up, and he brought me to his arms, I continued crying. I couldn't stop. A "release" (for lack of a better word) occurred, and the tears flowed. First time ever during a spanking.
It was cleansing.
The day started off great, but at one point, we disagreed about something involving one of our children, and the ensuing debate (he called it an argument) got a little heated. He left the room in a huff after raising his voice at me.
Once he calmed down, we descended to the basement to the Spank Room. The paddle came out. The lecture consisted of him retelling how it came that he yelled, his apology for raising his voice, his view that I was not listening but rather over-talking him, and that since this was not going to be a part of our relationship, a spanking must happen.
The pants went down.
The underwear went down.
My belly went down so that I was leaning over a storage bench.
Once in position, the warm up started. The warm up HURT. Once the real spanking started, it was a little unbearable. I started sobbing. Begging. Turning. Crying some more. Begging some more. Turning some more. When it was all said and done, I got a few extras for not staying still.
When I got up, and he brought me to his arms, I continued crying. I couldn't stop. A "release" (for lack of a better word) occurred, and the tears flowed. First time ever during a spanking.
It was cleansing.
Thursday, September 25, 2014
Double Trouble or The Hand and The Belt
Yes, it has happened - spanked twice in one day.
This afternoon, when the family arrived home, I was just plain off. I couldn't stop repetitive thoughts about past marital and life failures, and I was bubbling with anger and sadness. I started right away on HoH, chastising him and being critical. I couldn't shake it. I wanted him to feel the same pain I was feeling. I pushed and pushed until he made the decision. In the room. Door shut. TV turned up loud. Pants down. Undies on. The Hand. I have no idea how many I got, but I do know that it hurt after only something like 4 or 5 of them. I would guess I got around 20 solid, hard spanks.
It helped, a little.
Fast forward a few hours, after spending time at the park with our friends and one large gin drink later. Mouthy. Yes, that is probably the right word. HoH and I were just not connected. After arguing about dinner, and who would make it, and various other thing, I thought he was getting up to make dinner. Instead he shut the door, took off his belt, and again, it was punishment time. Over the underwear. Belt. 15 solid hits. OUCH! My bottom is bright red. It stings really badly.
This was the break through spank. I am feeling much better. I feel like some of that darkness was let go. The sting is reminding me that I am cared for. That it matters when we aren't connected. That I should and can be the better person that I want to be. That it is time to get back into submissive mode, where things are easier.
This afternoon, when the family arrived home, I was just plain off. I couldn't stop repetitive thoughts about past marital and life failures, and I was bubbling with anger and sadness. I started right away on HoH, chastising him and being critical. I couldn't shake it. I wanted him to feel the same pain I was feeling. I pushed and pushed until he made the decision. In the room. Door shut. TV turned up loud. Pants down. Undies on. The Hand. I have no idea how many I got, but I do know that it hurt after only something like 4 or 5 of them. I would guess I got around 20 solid, hard spanks.
It helped, a little.
Fast forward a few hours, after spending time at the park with our friends and one large gin drink later. Mouthy. Yes, that is probably the right word. HoH and I were just not connected. After arguing about dinner, and who would make it, and various other thing, I thought he was getting up to make dinner. Instead he shut the door, took off his belt, and again, it was punishment time. Over the underwear. Belt. 15 solid hits. OUCH! My bottom is bright red. It stings really badly.
This was the break through spank. I am feeling much better. I feel like some of that darkness was let go. The sting is reminding me that I am cared for. That it matters when we aren't connected. That I should and can be the better person that I want to be. That it is time to get back into submissive mode, where things are easier.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Outta the Groove
It only took being away for the weekend for all the wonderful submissive progress I have made to sort of disappear. I have been sick - exhausted, sore throat, nauseated - and my mouth has been full of accusations, anger, snide remarks, and not an ounce of submissiveness.
HoH has been confused about what to do. He doesn't want to spank me while I am sick. On the other hand, I feel like he is more interested in trying to "get off" than do what I think a good HoH should do: Take care of and baby me when I am sick.
This disconnect, and the failure of the my expectation being met, has turned me into a class A bitch. I am pretty sure my bottom needs to look like this.
HoH has been confused about what to do. He doesn't want to spank me while I am sick. On the other hand, I feel like he is more interested in trying to "get off" than do what I think a good HoH should do: Take care of and baby me when I am sick.
This disconnect, and the failure of the my expectation being met, has turned me into a class A bitch. I am pretty sure my bottom needs to look like this.
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Practicing Submission
Submission is not my normal state. I am a leader, and one who enjoys organizing, accomplishing, planning, and producing. I do that in the work place, in my religious life, and in my volunteer work. A lot of people rely on me, and I enjoy the benefit of self-satisfaction when I accomplish my goals. Traditionally, at home, I also had a strong voice, and exercised control over that area of my life. Therefore, submissiveness has been a challenge for me.
I do find submission in the bedroom to be much easier than out of the bedroom. In the bedroom, there is something electrifying about having to do what one is told, or be touched at will, or not being the director of the scene. I have been trying to stretch myself in that area, doing things I don't really want to do but doing so anyway because my HoH would find it pleasing. Even typing that makes me on some level cringe, and on some level be proud at my growth in this area. Some of the things I have done to try to tap into my submissiveness in the bedroom:
Had sex in the closet with the door shut and while the light in there was off when I was trying to get ready. Usually, I would say "Not now!" but I just turned to face the shoe rack and hold on, took my panties down, and let him enter me.
He asked me to retrieve a paper he asked me to throw away (I delegated it to my daughter), he discreetly shut the door and told me to carry it in my mouth, and crawl it to the trash can. I complied.
Without him asking, I shaved my entire nether region even though I HATE HATE HATE it like that. I did it to show him that I can and will submit to his will even though he didn't specifically ask.
I told him he had my permission to do what he wanted with or to me when I was sleeping last night. This is a big step for me, to give consensual non-consent. Again, I did this to show him that his pleasure is important, that my body is his to do with what he want, and that I trust him with my body. He touched me while I slept, came all over my bottom, then rubbed it in to my bottom and back.
I have asked a few times, is there anything I can do for you? Is there anything you want me to do? Do you want a back rub? Can I get you anything? This is NOT my normal default mode!
I have taken the initiative to look around for kink hotels that we could stay at if we ever get any extra money, and then I showed him the various rooms and what they look like.
I started a Pinterest page with things that I think would interest him, like Rope Work photographs, spanked photographs, lingerie photographs, erotic furniture/implements photographs, etc. Soon, when it is more populated, I will share the site with all of you in case you are interested in following it.
I do find submission in the bedroom to be much easier than out of the bedroom. In the bedroom, there is something electrifying about having to do what one is told, or be touched at will, or not being the director of the scene. I have been trying to stretch myself in that area, doing things I don't really want to do but doing so anyway because my HoH would find it pleasing. Even typing that makes me on some level cringe, and on some level be proud at my growth in this area. Some of the things I have done to try to tap into my submissiveness in the bedroom:
Had sex in the closet with the door shut and while the light in there was off when I was trying to get ready. Usually, I would say "Not now!" but I just turned to face the shoe rack and hold on, took my panties down, and let him enter me.
He asked me to retrieve a paper he asked me to throw away (I delegated it to my daughter), he discreetly shut the door and told me to carry it in my mouth, and crawl it to the trash can. I complied.
Without him asking, I shaved my entire nether region even though I HATE HATE HATE it like that. I did it to show him that I can and will submit to his will even though he didn't specifically ask.
I told him he had my permission to do what he wanted with or to me when I was sleeping last night. This is a big step for me, to give consensual non-consent. Again, I did this to show him that his pleasure is important, that my body is his to do with what he want, and that I trust him with my body. He touched me while I slept, came all over my bottom, then rubbed it in to my bottom and back.
I have asked a few times, is there anything I can do for you? Is there anything you want me to do? Do you want a back rub? Can I get you anything? This is NOT my normal default mode!
I have taken the initiative to look around for kink hotels that we could stay at if we ever get any extra money, and then I showed him the various rooms and what they look like.
I started a Pinterest page with things that I think would interest him, like Rope Work photographs, spanked photographs, lingerie photographs, erotic furniture/implements photographs, etc. Soon, when it is more populated, I will share the site with all of you in case you are interested in following it.
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