The hard thing about DD for us is that we are coming off a rocky time in our marriage, and things like TRUST and LEADERSHIP are hard for me to always grant to my HoH. Recently he made a few bad decisions, and quite frankly, I felt that I should be the HoH. How can he be the one I am supposed to trust, give my control to, and show respect/honor to? In light of these poor decisions HoH made, I felt that DD needed to be suspended. I mean, really, at the end of the day, how can I be submissive to someone who would be willing to risk the trust of his family with poor decisions. I also felt betrayed, hurt, upset, angry, sad, and hopeless. This lasted for days.
We have debated, fought, argued...he has admitted where he was wrong, apologized, and promised to do better/improve. I have struggled with what I want to do. It isn't always so cut and dry, this DD, especially when one has had a 22 year marriage, the last few years of which have been (understatement) complicated.
Today, I decided that I would try to move past this latest hiccup. He has been dying to spank me for reconnection reasons. He got to do that today. On the bed. Over clothes, then over underwear, then bare butt. By hand. I won't lie - I have missed it. The sweet sting was a welcome feeling, helping me to move forward.
We are back.
Congrats on your reconnection. Rebuilding trust after your hoh makes a bad decision is never easy. The only way I have been able to do it is after sincere apology, discussion on what went wrong and why, and his promise to be more thoughtful in the future. Beyond that there's nothing more to do than trust and submit again (for me, at least) :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experience on how to get through the bad decision. It really is not easy. Thanks for your support! :)
ReplyDeleteWow I feel like I could have written this! I feel like this explains our entire last week. I even told him I should be the HoH. It's always comforting to know that all of these experiences are normal. Love when you post!
ReplyDeleteOur lives are synchronized! LOL
DeleteJust wanted to say hello. I followed Willie's link here and have enjoyed reading your posts:) No matter the reason, I always find that reconnection spankings are good!
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by! I agree - reconnection spankings *are* good! :)
DeleteI'm glad this rocky patch of your marriage is coming to an end...I hope you two are stronger because of it. A spanking is a nice way to reconnect, IMO :)
ReplyDeleteIndeed. :)
Delete<3
ReplyDeleteOh Cherished by Him! <3 (((hugs)))
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ReplyDeleteYou are a stronger person than I am. Good for you, you are doing great
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